Thursday, November 11, 2010

Article in paper; "Tryst leads to girl's suicide"

A fourteen year old girl and an eighteen year old guy have sex.  According to both of them it was consensual, she was anxious to lose her virginity and chose him.  He was a neighbor and classmate.  She first communicated with him on My Space and told him she thought he was cute.  She also thought he was 15, he said he thought she was 16, or it never would have happened.  She admitted to her mother that she had sex with this boy, the police got involved, he was charged with rape, everything became very public and ugly, she was taunted at school, she killed herself.  These are the facts as I have read them, there is information missing, like who contacted the police and why, but it doesn't matter.  Here is what I want to say about all of this.  Sex is everywhere.  It is in everything kids watch on TV and at the movie theater. It is in the popular books kids read, (or at least hear and talk about).  It is in the music they listen to.  It is in most every ad the see.  It is in the video games they play and it is all over the internet.  Why would anyone be surprised, or appalled that kids as young as fourteen are having sex?  Why do we still have laws that make it illegal for an eighteen year old to have sex with a fourteen year old when everything about our society screams that sex in any way, everyday is okay?  The fashions of the day expose a young girl's butt, thighs, and breasts to the point where I sometimes have to turn away as they walk down the halls, because you know what?  I have seen it all, and I have seen too much.  And the guys, well their pants are worn so low they have to hold on to their crotch to keep them from falling down, but hey, what's wrong with that?  And they kiss and hug, and kiss and hug, and kiss and hug all day long, and no one says a thing, we adults just walk on by.  Why?  because it is so prevalent it is a battle the powers that be have chosen not to fight.  And when we do mention that perhaps the dress is a bit provocative and not appropriate, that the behavior is more risque than we would like to see in a school setting, the parents flock in and say "Stop picking on my kid!"  What went wrong here, according to what I have read, is that someone thought it was right to charge the boy with rape.  Do I like the idea of an eighteen year old having sex with a fourteen year old?  No.  Do I like the idea that a fourteen year old wanted to lose her virginity?  No.  Do I think any of this is right?  No.  But you can't tell someone that what they did was wrong when every message sent to them every day tells them that what they did was exactly what was expected of them.  The fourteen year old should not be dead, and she isn't dead because she had sex, she's dead because she didn't understand, neither do I.
Rosemary

1 comment:

  1. What is it that you don't understand? Is it the fact that our legislative bodies just pass laws when they can't figure out whats what. And the victims of these laws are just throw away people. There are a lot of people drinking the kool-aid these days. Where were her parents?

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